Book XI: The Lion, the Monkey, and the Two Asses

The lion, for his kingdom's sake,In morals would some lessons take,And therefore call'd, one summer's day,The monkey, master of the arts,An animal of brilliant parts,To hear what he could say.'Great king,' the monkey thus began,'To reign upon the wisest planRequires a prince to set his zeal,And passion for the public weal,Distinctly and quite high aboveA certain feeling call'd self-love,The parent of all vices,In creatures of all sizes.To will this feeling from one's breast away,Is not the easy labour of a day;'Tis much to moderate its tyrant sway.By that your majesty august,Will execute your royal trust,From folly free and aught unjust.''Give me,' replied the king,'Example of each thing.''Each species,' said the sage,--'And I begin with ours,--Exalts its own peculiar powersAbove sound reason's gauge.Meanwhile, all other kinds and tribesAs fools and blockheads it describes,With other compliments as cheap.But, on the other hand, the sameSelf-love inspires a beast to heapThe highest pyramid of fameFor every one that bears his name;Because he justly deems such praiseThe easiest way himself to raise.'Tis my conclusion in the case,That many a talent here belowIs but cabal, or sheer grimace,--The art of seeming things to know--An art in which perfection liesMore with the ignorant than wise.

'Two asses tracking, t'other day,Of which each in his turn,Did incense to the other burn,Quite in the usual way,--I heard one to his comrade say,"My lord, do you not findThe prince of knaves and foolsTo be this man, who boasts of mindInstructed in his schools?With wit unseemly and profane,He mocks our venerable race--On each of his who lacketh brainBestows our ancient surname, ass!And, with abusive tongue portraying,Describes our laugh and talk as braying!These bipeds of their folly tell us,While thus pretending to excel us.""No, 'tis for you to speak, my friend,And let their orators attend.The braying is their own, but let them be:We understand each other, and agree,And that's enough. As for your song,Such wonders to its notes belong,The nightingale is put to shame,And Lambert loses half his fame.""My lord," the other ass replied,"Such talents in yourself reside,Of asses all, the joy and pride."These donkeys, not quite satisfiedWith scratching thus each other's hide,Must needs the cities visit,Their fortunes there to raise,By sounding forth the praise,Each, of the other's skill exquisite.Full many, in this age of ours,--Not only among asses,But in the higher classes,Whom Heaven hath clothed with higher powers,--Dared they but do it, would exaltA simple innocence from fault,Or virtue common and domestic,To excellence majestic.I've said too much, perhaps; but I supposeYour majesty the secret won't disclose,Since 'twas your majesty's request that IThis matter should exemplify.How love of self gives food to ridicule,I've shown. To prove the balance of my rule,That justice is a sufferer thereby,A longer time will take.'

'Twas thus the monkey spake.But my informant does not state,That e'er the sage did demonstrateThe other point, more delicate.Perhaps he thought none but a foolA lion would too strictly school.