Act the Second: Scene XII

ROSAURA. Would I knew it not! O help meNow, kind heaven! for who could beSo prudential, so collected,As to know how best to actIn so painful a dilemma?Is there in the world a being,Is there one a more inclementHeaven has marked with more misfortunes,Has 'mid more of sorrow centred?--What, bewildered, shall I do,When 'tis vain to be expectedThat my reason can console me,Or consoling be my helper?From my earliest misfortuneEverything that I've attemptedHas been but one misery more --Each the other's sad successor,All inheritors of themselves.Thus, the Phoenix they resemble,One is from the other born,New life springs where old life endeth,And the young are warmly cradledBy the ashes of the elder.Once a wise man called them cowards,Seeing that misfortunes neverHave been seen to come alone.But I call them brave, intrepid,Who go straight unto their end,And ne'er turn their backs in terror:--By the man who brings them with himEverything may be attempted,Since he need on no occasionHave the fear of being deserted.I may say so, since at all times,Whatsoever life presented,I, without them, never saw me,Nor will they grow weary ever,Till they see me in death's arms,Wounded by fate's final weapon.Woe is me! but what to-dayShall I do in this emergence?--If I tell my name, Clotaldo,Unto whom I am indebtedFor my very life and honour,May be with me much offended;Since he said my reparationMust in silence be expected.If I tell not to AstolfoWho I am, and he detects meHow can I dissemble then?For although a feigned resemblanceEyes and voice and tongue might try,Ah, the truthful heart would tremble,And expose the lie. But whereforeStudy what to do? 'Tis certainThat however I may study,Think beforehand how to nerve me,When at last the occasion comes,Then alone what grief suggestethI will do, for no one holdsIn his power the heart's distresses.And thus what to say or doAs my soul cannot determine,Grief must only reach to-dayIts last limit, pain be ended,And at last an exit makeFrom the doubts that so perplex meHow to act: but until thenHelp me, heaven, oh, deign to help me!