To the Dean of St. Patrick's
SIR,Your Billingsgate Muse methinks does beginWith much greater noise than a conjugal din.A pox of her bawling, her tempora et mores!What are times now to me; a'nt I one of the Tories?You tell me my verses disturb you at prayers;Oh, oh, Mr. Dean, are you there with your bears?You pray, I suppose, like a Heathen, to Phoebus,To give his assistance to make out my rebus:Which I don't think so fair; leave it off for the future;When the combat is equal, this God should be neuter.I'm now at the tavern, where I drink all I can,To write with more spirit; I'll drink no more Helicon;For Helicon is water, and water is weak;'Tis wine on the gross lee, that makes your Muse speak.This I know by her spirit and life; but I thinkShe's much in the wrong to scold in her drink.Her damn'd pointed tongue pierced almost to my heart;Tell me of a cart,--tell me of a ----,I'd have you to tell on both sides her ears,If she comes to my house, that I'll kick her down stairs:Then home she shall limping go, squalling out, O my knee;You shall soon have a crutch to buy for your Melpomene.You may come as her bully, to bluster and swagger;But my ink is my poison, my pen is my dagger:Stand off, I desire, and mark what I say to you,If you come I will make your Apollo shine through you.Don't think, sir, I fear a Dean, as I would fear a dun;Which is all at present from yours,
Words in this poem
- billingsgate n.
- A market near the Billings gate in London, celebrated for fish and foul language.
- methinks v.
- It seems to me; I think. See Me. [AS. þyncan to seem, me þynceedh, me þuhte, OE. me thinketh, me thoughte; akin to G. dünken to seem, denken to think, and E. think. See Me, and Think.]
- mores n.
- Customs; habits; esp., customs conformity to which is more or less obligatory; customary law.
- phoebus n.
- Apollo; the sun god.
- helicon n.
- A mountain in Boeotia, in Greece, supposed by the Greeks to be the residence of Apollo and the Muses.
- shall v. i.
- To owe; to be under obligation for. [OE. shal, schal, imp. sholde, scholde, AS. scal, sceal, I am obliged, imp. scolde, sceolde, inf. sculan; akin to OS. skulan, pres. skal, imp. skolda, D. zullen,]
- crutch n.
- A staff with a crosspiece at the head, to be placed under the arm or shoulder, to support the lame or infirm in walking. [OE. cruche, AS. crycc, cricc; akin to D. kruk, G. kr, Dan. krykke, Sw. krycka, and to E. crook. See Crook, and cf. Cricket a low stool.]
- melpomene n.
- The Muse of tragedy.
- swagger v. i.
- To walk with a swaying motion; hence, to walk and act in a pompous, consequential manner. [Freq. of swag.]
Definitions and etymologies from Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, 1913.
About this text
To the Dean of St. Patrick's is in the public domain. This text is taken from The Poems of Jonathan Swift, D.D., Volume 2, Project Gutenberg ebook #13621; the transcription's header, footer and licence were removed and nothing else was changed. You may copy, print and reuse it freely.
Cite as: Jonathan Swift, To the Dean of St. Patrick's, in Poems, Volume II (1710–1745), text of Project Gutenberg ebook #13621, Laurel, https://laurelpoetry.com/poem/swift-poems/to-the-dean-of-st-patrick-s-2.html, id L09400.
Form and metre
To the Dean of St. Patrick's is 29 lines in a single stanza. It is in rhyming couplets, 55% of the lines. The metre is anapaestic tetrameter, measured from the stress the words themselves fix (confidence 81%). 87% of its stressed syllables fall where the metre puts the beat. The lines average 11.3 syllables. 8 lines end on an unstressed syllable, a feminine ending. 7% of the lines run on without a stop at the line end.
See other poems in rhyming couplets, other poems in anapaestic tetrameter.
Measured by Laurel's pipeline, not copied from a handbook: how stress and metre are counted, how rhyme is lettered, how a drifted rhyme is found. Where the dictionary cannot confirm a rhyme the letter is withheld, not guessed.
Rhyme words, stanza by stanza
The word that ends each line, lettered by the rhyme it makes; a dash is a line whose rhyme the dictionary could not confirm.
- 1 -AABBCCDD--E-FFGG---C--HHIIE- sir · beginA · dinA · moresB · toriesB · prayersC · bearsC · phoebusD · rebusD · future · neuter · canE · helicon · weakF · speakF · thinkG · drinkG · heart · a · ears · stairsC · knee · melpomene · swaggerH · daggerH · youI · youI · dunE · yours
Scansion, line by line
Each line with its syllable count and the stresses the words themselves fix: / stressed, ˘ unstressed, · a syllable the word leaves free and the metre decides. Read against anapaestic tetrameter. How this is done.
| Line | Syl. | Stress |
|---|---|---|
| SIR, | 1 | · |
| Your Billingsgate Muse methinks does begin | 10 | ·/˘˘·˘/·˘/ |
| With much greater noise than a conjugal din. | 10 | ··/˘···/˘· |
| A pox of her bawling, her tempora et mores! | 13 | ····/˘·····/· |
| What are times now to me; a'nt I one of the Tories? | 13 | ···········/˘ |
| You tell me my verses disturb you at prayers; | 11 | ····/˘˘/··· |
| Oh, oh, Mr. Dean, are you there with your bears? | 11 | ··/˘······· |
| You pray, I suppose, like a Heathen, to Phoebus, | 12 | ···˘/··/˘·/˘ |
| To give his assistance to make out my rebus: | 12 | ···˘/˘····/˘ |
| Which I don't think so fair; leave it off for the future; | 13 | ···········/˘ |
| When the combat is equal, this God should be neuter. | 13 | ··˘/·/˘····/˘ |
| I'm now at the tavern, where I drink all I can, | 12 | ····/˘······ |
| To write with more spirit; I'll drink no more Helicon; | 12 | ····/····/˘· |
| For Helicon is water, and water is weak; | 12 | ·/˘··/˘·/˘·· |
| 'Tis wine on the gross lee, that makes your Muse speak. | 11 | ··········· |
| This I know by her spirit and life; but I think | 11 | ·····/····· |
| She's much in the wrong to scold in her drink. | 10 | ·········· |
| Her damn'd pointed tongue pierced almost to my heart; | 11 | ··/˘··/···· |
| Tell me of a cart,--tell me of a ----, | 9 | ········· |
| I'd have you to tell on both sides her ears, | 10 | ·········· |
| If she comes to my house, that I'll kick her down stairs: | 12 | ············ |
| Then home she shall limping go, squalling out, O my knee; | 13 | ····/˘·/˘···· |
| You shall soon have a crutch to buy for your Melpomene. | 14 | ··········˘/˘˘ |
| You may come as her bully, to bluster and swagger; | 13 | ·····/˘·/˘·/˘ |
| But my ink is my poison, my pen is my dagger: | 13 | ·····/˘····/˘ |
| Stand off, I desire, and mark what I say to you, | 12 | ···˘/······· |
| If you come I will make your Apollo shine through you. | 13 | ·······˘/˘··· |
| Don't think, sir, I fear a Dean, as I would fear a dun; | 13 | ············· |
| Which is all at present from yours, | 8 | ····/˘·· |
The reader shows the same poem with its rhymes coloured and a stress row above each line, the notes beside their stanzas, and any word's definition on a tap; the analysis page takes the whole book apart. How every part of this site was made.