Prince the Piper

A little, friv'lous, abject mind,Pleased with the rabble, puff'd with wind,When once, as fast as pride presumes,Itself with vanity it plumes,Is by fond lightness brought with easeTo any ridicule you please.One Prince, a piper to the play,Was rather noted in his way,As call'd upon to show his art,Whene'er Bathyllus did his part.He being at a certain fair,(I do not well remember where,)While they pull'd down the booth in haste,Not taking heed, his leg displaced,He from the scaffold fell so hard--(Would he his pipes had rather marr'd!Though they, poor fellow! were to himAs dear almost as life and limb).Borne by the kind officious crowd,Home he's conducted, groaning loud.Some months elapsed before he foundHimself recover'd of his wound:Meantime, according to their way,The droll frequenters of the playHad a great miss of him, whose touchThe dancers' spirits raised so much.A certain man of high renownWas just preparing for the townSome games the mob to entertain,When Prince began to walk again;Whom, what with bribes and pray'rs, his gracePrevail'd upon to show his faceIn this performance, by all means--And while he waits behind the scenes,A rumour through the house is spread,By certain, that "the piper's dead."Others cried out, "The man is here,And will immediately appear."The curtain draws, the lightnings flash,The gods speak out their usual trash.An ode, not to the Piper known,Was to the chorus leader shown,Which he was order'd to repeat,And which was closed with this conceit--"Receive with joy, O loyal Rome,Thy Prince just rescued from his tomb."They all at once stand up and clap,At which my most facetious chapKisses his hand, and scrapes and bowsTo his good patrons in the house.First the equestrian order smokeThe fool's mistake, and high in joke,Command the song to be encored;Which ended, flat upon the boardThe Piper falls, the knights acclaim;The people think that Prince's aimIs for a crown of bays at least.Now all the seats perceived the jest,And with his bandage white as snow,White frock, white pumps, a perfect beautyProud of the feats he had achieved,And these high honours he received,With one unanimous huzza, PoorPrince was kick'd out of the play.