The Plagues of a Country Life
A companion with news; a great want of shoes;Eat lean meat or choose; a church without pews;Our horses away; no straw, oats, or hay;December in May; our boys run away; all servants at play.
Imprimis, there's a table blotted,A tatter'd hanging all bespotted.A bed of flocks, as I may rank it,Reduced to rug and half a blanket.A tinder box without a flint,An oaken desk with nothing in't;A pair of tongs bought from a broker,A fender and a rusty poker;A penny pot and basin, thisDesign'd for water, that for piss;A broken-winded pair of bellows,Two knives and forks, but neither fellows.Item, a surplice, not unmeeting,Either for table-cloth, or sheeting;There is likewise a pair of breeches,But patch'd, and fallen in the stitches,Hung up in study very little,Plaster'd with cobweb and spittle,An airy prospect all so pleasing,From my light window without glazing,A trencher and a College bottle,Piled up on Locke and Aristotle.A prayer-book, which he seldom handlesA save-all and two farthing candles.A smutty ballad, musty libel,A Burgersdicius and a Bible.The C**** Seasons and the SensesBy Overton, to save expenses.Item, (if I am not much mistaken,)A mouse-trap with a bit of bacon.A candlestick without a snuffer,Whereby his fingers often suffer.Two odd old shoes I should not skip here,Each strapless serves instead of slippers,And chairs a couple, I forgot 'em,But each of them without a bottom.Thus I in rhyme have comprehendedHis goods, and so my schedule's ended.
Words in this poem
- imprimis adv.
- In the first place; first in order. [L., for in primis among the first, chiefly; in in + primus first.]
- oaken a.
- Made or consisting of oaks or of the wood of oaks. [AS. acen.]
- fender n.
- One who or that which defends or protects by warding off harm; as: (a) A screen to prevent coals or sparks of an open fire from escaping to the floor. [From Fend, v. t. & i., cf. Defender.]
- piss v. t.
- To discharge urine, to urinate. [OE. pissen, F. pisser; akin to It. pisciare, D. & G. pissen, Dan. pisse, Icel. pissa.]
- sheeting n.
- Cotton or linen cloth suitable for bed sheets. It is sometimes made of double width.
- cobweb n.
- The network spread by a spider to catch its prey. [Cob a spider + web.]
- trencher n.
- One who trenches; esp., one who cuts or digs ditches. [OE. trencheoir, F. tranchoir, fr. trancher to cut, carve. See Trench, v. t.]
- piled a.
- Having a pile or point; pointed. [From 2d Pile.]
- smutty a.
- Soiled with smut; smutted.
- candlestick n.
- An instrument or utensil for supporting a candle. [AS. candel-sticca; candel candle + sticca stick.]
- snuffer n.
- One who snuffs.
Definitions and etymologies from Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, 1913.
About this text
The Plagues of a Country Life is in the public domain. This text is taken from The Poems of Jonathan Swift, D.D., Volume 2, Project Gutenberg ebook #13621; the transcription's header, footer and licence were removed and nothing else was changed. You may copy, print and reuse it freely.
Cite as: Jonathan Swift, The Plagues of a Country Life, in Poems, Volume II (1710–1745), text of Project Gutenberg ebook #13621, Laurel, https://laurelpoetry.com/poem/swift-poems/the-plagues-of-a-country-life.html, id L09425.
Form and metre
The Plagues of a Country Life is 42 lines in 2 stanzas. The metre is iambic pentameter, measured from the stress the words themselves fix (confidence 89%). 95% of its stressed syllables fall where the metre puts the beat. The lines average 9.1 syllables. 29 lines end on an unstressed syllable, a feminine ending. 10% of the lines run on without a stop at the line end.
See other poems in iambic pentameter.
Measured by Laurel's pipeline, not copied from a handbook: how stress and metre are counted, how rhyme is lettered, how a drifted rhyme is found. Where the dictionary cannot confirm a rhyme the letter is withheld, not guessed.
Rhyme words, stanza by stanza
The word that ends each line, lettered by the rhyme it makes; a dash is a line whose rhyme the dictionary could not confirm.
- 1 AABB shoesA · pewsA · hayB · playB
- 2 AABBCCDDEEFFGG--HH--IIJJKK--LLMM--NN-- blottedA · bespottedA · itB · blanketB · flintC · in'tC · brokerD · pokerD · thisE · pissE · bellowsF · fellowsF · unmeetingG · sheetingG · breeches · stitches · littleH · spittleH · pleasing · glazing · bottleI · aristotleI · handlesJ · candlesJ · libelK · bibleK · senses · expenses · mistakenL · baconL · snufferM · sufferM · here · slippers · emN · bottomN · comprehended · ended
Scansion, line by line
Each line with its syllable count and the stresses the words themselves fix: / stressed, ˘ unstressed, · a syllable the word leaves free and the metre decides. Read against iambic pentameter. How this is done.
| Line | Syl. | Stress |
|---|---|---|
| A companion with news; a great want of shoes; | 11 | ·˘/˘······· |
| Eat lean meat or choose; a church without pews; | 10 | ·········· |
| Our horses away; no straw, oats, or hay; | 10 | //˘˘/····· |
| December in May; our boys run away; all servants at play. | 15 | ˘/˘··/··˘/·/˘·· |
| Imprimis, there's a table blotted, | 9 | ˘/˘··/˘/˘ |
| A tatter'd hanging all bespotted. | 9 | ·/˘/˘···· |
| A bed of flocks, as I may rank it, | 9 | ········· |
| Reduced to rug and half a blanket. | 9 | ˘/·····/˘ |
| A tinder box without a flint, | 8 | ·/˘····· |
| An oaken desk with nothing in't; | 8 | ·/˘··/˘· |
| A pair of tongs bought from a broker, | 9 | ·······/˘ |
| A fender and a rusty poker; | 9 | ·/˘··/˘/˘ |
| A penny pot and basin, this | 8 | ·/˘··/˘· |
| Design'd for water, that for piss; | 8 | ˘/·/˘··· |
| A broken-winded pair of bellows, | 9 | ·/˘/˘··/˘ |
| Two knives and forks, but neither fellows. | 9 | ·····/˘/˘ |
| Item, a surplice, not unmeeting, | 9 | /˘·/˘···· |
| Either for table-cloth, or sheeting; | 9 | /˘·/˘··/˘ |
| There is likewise a pair of breeches, | 9 | ··/····/˘ |
| But patch'd, and fallen in the stitches, | 9 | ···/˘··/˘ |
| Hung up in study very little, | 9 | ···/˘/˘/˘ |
| Plaster'd with cobweb and spittle, | 8 | /˘·/··/˘ |
| An airy prospect all so pleasing, | 9 | ·/˘/˘··/˘ |
| From my light window without glazing, | 9 | ···/˘··/˘ |
| A trencher and a College bottle, | 9 | ·/˘··/˘/˘ |
| Piled up on Locke and Aristotle. | 9 | ·····/˘·˘ |
| A prayer-book, which he seldom handles | 9 | ·····/˘/˘ |
| A save-all and two farthing candles. | 9 | ·····/˘/˘ |
| A smutty ballad, musty libel, | 9 | ·/˘/˘/˘/˘ |
| A Burgersdicius and a Bible. | 9 | ·······/˘ |
| The C**** Seasons and the Senses | 8 | ··/˘··/˘ |
| By Overton, to save expenses. | 9 | ·/˘˘··˘/˘ |
| Item, (if I am not much mistaken,) | 10 | /˘·····˘/˘ |
| A mouse-trap with a bit of bacon. | 9 | ·······/˘ |
| A candlestick without a snuffer, | 9 | ·/˘····/˘ |
| Whereby his fingers often suffer. | 9 | ···/˘/˘/˘ |
| Two odd old shoes I should not skip here, | 9 | ········· |
| Each strapless serves instead of slippers, | 9 | ····˘/·/˘ |
| And chairs a couple, I forgot 'em, | 9 | ···/˘·˘/· |
| But each of them without a bottom. | 9 | ·······/˘ |
| Thus I in rhyme have comprehended | 9 | ······˘/˘ |
| His goods, and so my schedule's ended. | 9 | ·····/˘/˘ |
Notes from the edition 2
The notes to the Poems of Jonathan Swift, Volume II (Project Gutenberg #13621).
- Stanza 2, line 26 Francis Burgersdicius, author of "An Argument to prove that the 39th section of the Lth chapter of the Statutes given by Queen Elizabeth to the University of Cambridge includes the whole Statutes of that University, with an answer to the Argument and the Author's reply." London, 1727. He was one of those logicians that Swift so disliked.--W. E. B.
- Stanza 2, line 27 Illegible. John Overton, 1640-1708, a dealer in mezzotints.--W. E. B.
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