John Ballard
In the lust of my strengthI cursed God, but he paid no attention to me:I might as well have cursed the stars.In my last sickness I was in agony, but I was resoluteAnd I cursed God for my suffering;Still He paid no attention to me;He left me alone, as He had always done.I might as well have cursed the Presbyterian steeple.Then, as I grew weaker, a terror came over me:Perhaps I had alienated God by cursing him.One day Lydia Humphrey brought me a bouquetAnd it occurred to me to try to make friends with God,So I tried to make friends with Him;But I might as well have tried to make friends with the bouquet.Now I was very close to the secret,For I really could make friends with the bouquetBy holding close to me the love in me for the bouquetAnd so I was creeping upon the secret, but—
Words in this poem
- lust v. i.
- To list; to like. [AS. lystan. See Lust, n., and cf. List to choose.]
- cursed a.
- Deserving a curse; execrable; hateful; detestable; abominable.
Definitions and etymologies from Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, 1913.
About this text
John Ballard is in the public domain. This text is taken from Spoon River Anthology, Project Gutenberg ebook #1280; the transcription's header, footer and licence were removed and nothing else was changed. You may copy, print and reuse it freely.
Cite as: Edgar Lee Masters, John Ballard, in Spoon River Anthology (1915), text of Project Gutenberg ebook #1280, Laurel, https://laurelpoetry.com/poem/masters-spoon-river/john-ballard.html, id L07950.
Form and metre
John Ballard is 18 lines in a single stanza. 82% of its stressed syllables fall where the metre puts the beat. The lines average 11.5 syllables. 3 lines end on an unstressed syllable, a feminine ending. 28% of the lines run on without a stop at the line end.
Measured by Laurel's pipeline, not copied from a handbook: how stress and metre are counted, how rhyme is lettered, how a drifted rhyme is found. Where the dictionary cannot confirm a rhyme the letter is withheld, not guessed.
Rhyme words, stanza by stanza
The word that ends each line, lettered by the rhyme it makes; a dash is a line whose rhyme the dictionary could not confirm.
- 1 -A---A--ABC-BCDCCD strength · meA · stars · resolute · suffering · meA · done · steeple · meA · himB · bouquetC · god · himB · bouquetC · secretD · bouquetC · bouquetC · butD
Scansion, line by line
Each line with its syllable count and the stresses the words themselves fix: / stressed, ˘ unstressed, · a syllable the word leaves free and the metre decides. How this is done.
| Line | Syl. | Stress |
|---|---|---|
| In the lust of my strength | 6 | ······ |
| I cursed God, but he paid no attention to me: | 12 | ·······˘/˘·· |
| I might as well have cursed the stars. | 8 | ········ |
| In my last sickness I was in agony, but I was resolute | 17 | ···/˘···/˘˘···/˘· |
| And I cursed God for my suffering; | 9 | ······/˘˘ |
| Still He paid no attention to me; | 9 | ····˘/˘·· |
| He left me alone, as He had always done. | 11 | ···˘/···/·· |
| I might as well have cursed the Presbyterian steeple. | 14 | ········˘/˘˘/˘ |
| Then, as I grew weaker, a terror came over me: | 13 | ····/˘·/˘···· |
| Perhaps I had alienated God by cursing him. | 14 | ˘/··/˘˘·˘··/˘· |
| One day Lydia Humphrey brought me a bouquet | 12 | ··/˘˘/˘···˘/ |
| And it occurred to me to try to make friends with God, | 13 | ··˘/········· |
| So I tried to make friends with Him; | 8 | ········ |
| But I might as well have tried to make friends with the bouquet. | 14 | ············˘/ |
| Now I was very close to the secret, | 10 | ···/˘···/˘ |
| For I really could make friends with the bouquet | 11 | ··/˘·····˘/ |
| By holding close to me the love in me for the bouquet | 14 | ·/˘·········˘/ |
| And so I was creeping upon the secret, but— | 12 | ····/˘···/˘· |
The reader shows the same poem with its rhymes coloured and a stress row above each line, the notes beside their stanzas, and any word's definition on a tap; the analysis page takes the whole book apart. How every part of this site was made.