The King of Bores
Abundant bores afflict this world, and someAre bores of magnitude that-come and--no,They're always coming, but they never go--Like funeral pageants, as they drone and humTheir lurid nonsense like a muffled drum,Or bagpipe's dread unnecessary flow.But one superb tormentor I can show--Prince Fiddlefaddle, Duc de Feefawfum.He the johndonkey is who, when I penAmorous verses in an idle moodTo nobody, or of her, reads them throughAnd, smirking, says he knows the lady; thenCalls me sly dog. I wish he understoodThis tender sonnet's application too.
Words in this poem
- afflict v. t.
- To strike or cast down; to overthrow. [L. afflictus, p. p. of affigere to cast down, deject; ad + fligere to strike: cf. OF. aflit, afflict, p. p. Cf. Flagellate.]
- lurid a.
- Pale yellow; ghastly pale; wan; gloomy; dismal. [L. luridus.]
- superb a.
- Grand; magnificent; august; stately; as, a superb edifice; a superb colonnade. [F. superbe, L. superbus, fr. super over. See Super-.]
- tormentor n.
- One who, or that which, torments; one who inflicts penal anguish or tortures. Jer. Taylor.
- nobody n.
- No person; no one; not anybody. [No, a. + body.]
Definitions and etymologies from Webster's Unabridged Dictionary, 1913.
About this text
The King of Bores is in the public domain. This text is taken from Shapes of Clay (1903), Project Gutenberg ebook #12658; the transcription's header, footer and licence were removed and nothing else was changed. You may copy, print and reuse it freely.
Cite as: Ambrose Bierce, The King of Bores, in Shapes of Clay (1903), text of Project Gutenberg ebook #12658, Laurel, https://laurelpoetry.com/poem/bierce-shapes-of-clay/the-king-of-bores.html, id L28184.
Form and metre
The King of Bores is 14 lines in a single stanza. The metre is iambic pentameter, measured from the stress the words themselves fix (confidence 90%).
See other poems in iambic pentameter.
Measured by Laurel's pipeline, not copied from a handbook: how stress and metre are counted, how rhyme is lettered, how a drifted rhyme is found. Where the dictionary cannot confirm a rhyme the letter is withheld, not guessed.
Rhyme words, stanza by stanza
The word that ends each line, lettered by the rhyme it makes; a dash is a line whose rhyme the dictionary could not confirm.
- 1 ABBAABB-C-DC-D someA · noB · goB · humA · drumA · flowB · showB · feefawfum · penC · mood · throughD · thenC · understood · tooD
Scansion, line by line
Each line with its syllable count and the stresses the words themselves fix: / stressed, ˘ unstressed, · a syllable the word leaves free and the metre decides. Read against iambic pentameter. How this is done.
| Line | Syl. | Stress |
|---|---|---|
| Abundant bores afflict this world, and some | 10 | ˘/˘·˘/···· |
| Are bores of magnitude that-come and--no, | 10 | ···/˘····· |
| They're always coming, but they never go-- | 10 | ·/·/˘··/˘· |
| Like funeral pageants, as they drone and hum | 10 | ·/˘/˘····· |
| Their lurid nonsense like a muffled drum, | 10 | ·/˘/˘··/˘· |
| Or bagpipe's dread unnecessary flow. | 10 | ·/··˘/˘·˘· |
| But one superb tormentor I can show-- | 10 | ··˘//·˘··· |
| Prince Fiddlefaddle, Duc de Feefawfum. | 8 | ·/˘····· |
| He the johndonkey is who, when I pen | 10 | ·········· |
| Amorous verses in an idle mood | 10 | /˘˘/˘··/˘· |
| To nobody, or of her, reads them through | 10 | ·/········ |
| And, smirking, says he knows the lady; then | 10 | ·/˘····/˘· |
| Calls me sly dog. I wish he understood | 10 | ········˘/ |
| This tender sonnet's application too. | 10 | ·/˘/˘·˘/˘· |
The reader shows the same poem with its rhymes coloured and a stress row above each line, the notes beside their stanzas, and any word's definition on a tap; the analysis page takes the whole book apart. How every part of this site was made.